Well, my indoor soccer team is three games into the latest "season" in which we moved up a division. Our first two games we were absolutely murdered, 7-1 and 8-2 if I recall correctly, but tonight we "only" lost 7-5. Moral victories are for losers, I always say... but that's what we are. In the previous "season" I was one of our primary offensive weapons... if not THE primary offensive weapon. I'm certainly the fastest guy on the team, and seem to be in the best shape (and I'm not in good shape by my seemingly lofty standards) but it is a little unusual for me to be THE primary offensive weapon. You see, my M.O. for most of my soccer playing days has been a defensive stalwart and/or "gritty playmaker" type person. All of a sudden I've gone from the "Grinder-Playmaker" guy to the "Scorer" guy... but I don't make a very good "Scorer," it's just not me (and everyone who knows me should understand this).

But, nonetheless, I scored probably 33-40% of the goals last "season," with a few assists thrown in here and there. I recall one stretch, over the course of 2 games, in which I was involved in something like 5 of 7 or 6 of 8 goals, as either the scorer or the assister. Lately, I have been racking up very few assists, which is as clear an indication as any that I have become a "scorer," as well as the fact that it is very atypical for me as a player.

This "season," in the two games before tonight, I didn't have any goals or assists -- which of course isn't really saying much seeing as how we have scored a whopping three (3) goals. Tonight, I opened the scoring with a pretty goal, then we proceeded to fall behind 5-1 at halftime, then 7-1 early in the second. We got a garbage goal to go 7-2, then I scored my second to pull to 7-3. We seemed to catch fire, and Kevin, who is probably right with me in scoring for our team over the last couple months, scored two to get it to 7-5.

So, I got off the schneid (sp? schnide?) on an individual basis, and we got off the schneid as a team. We played a hell of a lot better tonight than our previous two games, and I felt like I played with a hustle and the "controlled desperation" I need to perform well. Of course, all I can think about is three blown chances in the second, including a perfect chance with a minute left... I just fucked it up. I console myself by thinking it was a result of fatigue, which is a perfectly legitmate reason, and that I played my ass off, which I feel is true.

I guess I can walk away from this one feeling okay about myself.