Ambiguously Disgruntled Manifesto

wasting your time since 1975

2/15/2002

Well, I think we now have some definitive proof that cats are taking over the World:
She is the cat's meow in cloning
Soon we will be over-run by cute, fuzzy kitties, controlling all our comfortable places to sit and sleep and rendering our nice furniture into extravagant scratching posts. They will of course strike first and most intensely at those who are allergic to or otherwise don't like them, causing them to fold under a constant barrage of leg-rubbing and purring.

I, for one, welcome the coming invasion. I look forward to the mandatory nap times which will increase our usual sleeping hours per day to 16. While the crouching under shrubbery for hours waiting for a hapless songbird to flutter along may take some getting used to, I will certainly enjoy the leisurely pace of life which our feline rulers will provide for us. Getting up in the predawn hours for a "hunting" session won't be so bad when we can follow that up with our morning nap in a sunbeam. And, beyond all that, if the weather really sucks, we can just hang out in the garage or just stay inside and find a high piece of furniture to curl up on. If company comes over, and we're not particularly interested in being social, we can simple crawl under the bed and zonk out. Add to this the joys of a good scratch behind the ears, and the occasional intoxicating roll through some catnip, and life sounds pretty good.

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